Helen: Hello, and thanks for joining me, Helen Johnson for the Happier Grey Podcast. I'm pro-ageing and love my grey hair, but I know it can be quite intimidating to take the plunge. So, each week I'll be chatting to other women who've chosen to embrace the grey in the hope of inspiring and supporting you, whether you already have silver hair, in the process of going grey, or just considering ditching the dye.

Today's guest is Silvina Neder. She comes from a background in consumer insights and marketing. Embracing her natural grey hair became a turning point that unexpectedly reshaped her career, leading her into modelling, and later into becoming a grey hair influencer, where she supports and inspires women navigating their own transition to grey.

This personal journey also led her to found Silvina London, a haircare line exclusively for grey hair, with a strong focus on health, hydration, and natural silver glow. Silvina strongly believes that embracing grey hair can be one of the most empowering decisions a woman can make. For her going grey brought clarity, freedom, and a deep sense of self. And this is the message she's passionate about sharing with other women on their grey hair journey.

Hello, Silvina. How are you?

Silvina: Hello Helen. Thank you very much for having me. I'm great. Thank you.

Helen: Cool. I am gonna start by asking you what your hair was like when you were a child?

Silvina: Oh, my hair was big, curly. I have a lot of hair, and a lot of curls, and very dark, like brown. Not black, but brown, but very, very big. And before having grey hair, my main struggle, I would say, were my curls. Which now I love, ironically, yes.

But I fighted against my curls during all my childhood, my teenage years, and my youth. Until first embrace my curls. And then later, I embraced my grey hair.

Helen: So, did you have long hair when you were a child?

Silvina: Yes, but not so long because it was massive work for my mother, when I had to go to school and she had to wash my hair, and comb my hair, and do like a hairdo like some threads or something. It was a lot of hair, really a lot of hair, a lot of thick, big hair.

So yes, when I was like 10, 12, but then I started to have a shorter, like a Bob, something like that, which I didn't like very much because I wanted straight, long hair as my friends, but my hair was so big, that I had to go shorter. 

Helen: Can you remember when you found your first white hair?

Silvina: I can't remember the first one at all, but I remember it was my twenties. I remember in my twenties I started finding a lot of grey hair. I am from Argentina, and I am from not a little town, but a normal town. And I moved to Buenos Aires, to the capital, which is a massive city, after I finished the Uni. 

And I was very young, I was 22, and I moved from that small city, to Buenos Aires. Studying a Masters in Science. And I was very stressed and I remember then I was in 22, 23, that I started to see a lot of grey hair, yes.

Helen: And did you start dyeing it at that point?

Silvina: Yes, definitely. I was dyeing the hair before because it was the 80s, and was very trendy to have highlights, remember? So, I had a lot of highlights. And yeah, highlights were how I concealed my grey hair. 

But I started doing highlights because I liked highlights. And then highlights became, my normal. And then I realized I had a lot of grey hair, late twenties. And I started colouring the hair, I guess.

Helen: And how often did you have to colour it?

Silvina: Horribly, every two weeks, three weeks, three weeks top, because my hair grows really fast.

Helen: Okay.

Silvina: and I have my grey hair in the front, all around my face, so it was like a silver headband that I have in two weeks. And you know what, when you don't like something about you, you are watching, your focus is there, right?

Helen: Mm-hmm.

Silvina: And my focus was there in front of the mirror. So, every time I passed in front of a mirror, I saw my grey hair, my focus was there. So, I couldn't bear more than three weeks at all.

Helen: Okay. I kind of understand where you're at. I have less white hair, but I think you have, the whole time you're dyeing it, you have low grade root stress. Basically, because it might be okay for a few days, and then when you've left it for that long, you start to see the white coming through.

Silvina: yeah, yeah, yeah, no, and my hair, my original, my natural hair was dark. I still have that dark hair in the back. And my white hair is really white, so it was very, very noticeable, very noticeable. And it's around the face, so there was no way that I didn't see my grey hair. 

Helen: And what colour were you dyeing it?

Silvina: Well, usually I try to match my colour, like brown. But sometimes I tried other shades, different shades of brown, like a little bit, lighter, maybe a little bit reddish, not red, not red at all, of course, because I'm dark. But, with the warm hue, something like that. Yeah, yeah.

Helen: How many years did you dye it for?

Silvina: Counting the highlights, I think the highlights I started in my 17, 16, something like that. And the last time I coloured my hair I was 47.

Helen: Okay, so.

Silvina: So almost 30 years.

Helen: What was the trigger for deciding to stop colouring it?

Silvina: Well, I moved to London in 2015, and before, the colour of my hair was not about the highlighting anymore, it was about hiding the grey hair. Since my thirties, I would say, it was not about the colour, the nice colour of the hair or the highlights or the trends. It was about hiding the grey hair. 

And since my early forties, I travelled a lot for work. And I used to see women, very, very stylish, very interesting women in my travels to, I don't know, Paris, New York, London. Like, smart women, and I said this has to look really good. But I didn't dare. I was living in Argentina, and it was at that time like a very, conservative society where women have to look young. So, I didn't dare going grey. 

And then I moved to London, and it was freedom, London. But also, I didn't have time. I had a new job in marketing and consumer insights, a new language, a new city. And it was really, really stressful, and I didn't have time to, I had to work a lot. And, it was very expensive when I arrived to colour my hair.

And I said, I can't plan. I had to book an appointment 15 days in advance. And I said, I don't know what will happen in my work, in my job, if I will be able to leave at this time or not, because I used to work late. And I'm not colouring my hair anymore. 

But there have been a couple of years before that I had that in my mind. That I was wishing to have the courage to embrace my grey hair. I was waiting for the moment to, okay, this is the time. I really wanted, and it was like I needed something to allow me to say, yes, I can do it. I will do it.

Helen: So, your grow out, did you literally just stop dyeing,

Silvina: Yes.

 Helen: and have the solid line?

Silvina: Yes. Yes. Yes. Because, I saw some stylist to do some, balayage, like, highlights in the coloured part, but I knew it was going to ruin the hair. And also, my hair grows really fast, so since I was like trying to find out what to do, what to do, I had like 10 centimetres.

And you know what? It felt so good, even if I had like half of the hair white, and then the ends with colour, it felt great because it felt like something like I was rebel. I was doing what I wanted. I was being myself. And I was like okay, I don't mind what others think about this, I love it, I am happy.

I finally did it, I finally have the courage. I don't know the word in English precisely, but the, I dared going grey. I did it, I made it.

Helen: So, you didn't feel particularly self-conscious during the grow out then,

Silvina: No. I love.

Helen:  when you had the two-tone hair?

Silvina: Very beginning I would say yes. Because when you have like two centimetres, one, two, three centimetres, it's like nobody can tell there's an intention there,

Helen: Yeah.

Silvina: right? But then when you have more than four, five centimetres, it's I'm doing this. 

Helen: Yeah.

Silvina: This is my decision. This is not something that's happening because I don't have time. It's my decision, so. It felt great. 

And also, it was funny because I was working in a consumer insights agency, and my workmates were really young. I was in my late 40s, and they were like in their 20s, early 30s. And I said, oh, I'm growing my grey hair. Oh,Silvina, we thought you did it on purpose. It's so cool. I love that. 

Yeah, it felt great. And I think that curly hair is easier because you can do some. I don't know, something in the hair, I played with clips, with like a thread, or something, and It was fun.

Helen: And how long did it take you to grow it all out?

Silvina: Oh nothing, like nine months, because I cut it like now, I had it cut. 

Helen: So, you went quite short?

Silvina: No question, like now, a little bit shorter, but not so short. Something like10 centimetres total in all the head, yeah.

Helen: Yeah. If you went grey in 2015. That was kind of before the Lockdown wave. How do people react to you, and your hair?

Silvina: It was great because, I felt great. I felt that I have done what I wanted. And the reaction of the people, wow, it looks great. It looks great. And also, my hair grew healthy, shiny. It was like a hair with no, no chemicals. It was like beautiful hair. 

And also, it was like a change of mindset. It was like, okay, this is my age. I don't want to be younger. I want to be my age. The best I can look my age, but not younger. And I used to do, for example, Botox before in my late 30s, early 40s. And then I said, no, I'm not doing anything else. I'm this age, and I'm fine. 

And I also have like a very informal style with oversized clothes, trainers. And everywhere I went people say, oh I love your hair, I love your look. 

I had done market research, consumer insights for 30 years. And I was really trying to do something different, but I wanted to encourage people to, for example, monetize what they know how to do.

I used to have my own business before moving to London. I had my own business. And I'm very like entrepreneurial. Very, I want to do my thing, right? And I like when people do something that they love, and they have independence, and they can make decisions. 

I really don't like when I hear people, I don't like my job, for example. I say, okay, quit, do something different. I am creative, you know. And I was trying to shape something like that, but I had to make a living, of course. In London, not so easy. But when I was in that period, like growing my grey hair, everywhere I went, people say, I love your hair, I love your look.

And then I had a photo taken from my own market research agency, and the photographer say, Silvina, you have to be a model. Because in five minutes I have the photo. I say, why not? And I sent photos that were for my market research agency, not for modelling at all, they were like business kind. And I was booked immediately for jobs. 

There were not many 40-something women with grey hair by that time. So, it was like bold, right? It was like a statement. So, I started to book jobs, and I started posting on Instagram, and people started to follow me. It was like 2017 more or less. 

And I found my purpose there because a lot of women said, Silvina, you showed me that, if I grow my grey hair, I can look good. I can look great. And yeah, like encouraging women to be who you are. Embrace your age, embrace your look, embrace your natural look, and that was my purpose, yeah.

Helen: Cool. Did your style change at all when you went grey?

Silvina: I think I started to wearing more comfortable things. I always liked clothing, and styling, but very, very comfortable, to prioritize comfort. And I think I sticked more to my style, not to what is in, when well I was older as well, right? But not, to the trends, but more my style. And follow that, listen more to my style.

If I like something, a piece of cloth that I really like it, okay, I will get it because I like it. I mean actually it’s true, I am thinking in a loud voice while I’m talking to you. And it’s true because I have clothes, pieces that I bought like 10, 12 years ago, and I still love them. So, they reflect my style, comfortable, easy to wear.

Helen: What about the colours you wear? Have they changed at all?

Silvina: Well today I have a bright colour, but I usually I'm more white, grey, natural colours. I wouldn't say I have a very bright palette at all. Because I think that as my hair is so big, and as many people have told me, I speak with my hands, you know, it’s true actually, but if I have a lot on me, it's too much.

I try to simplify. Because I don't want to be too much. Not in the sense of censoring, being bold, because I love being bold. With some sense of good taste, let's say, like that. I don't know if it's properly said, but, yeah.

Helen: How did you come to develop a haircare range?

Silvina: Well, in 2017, or 2016, when I had grey hair, I tried all the blue shampoos, purple shampoos, all in the market. I even ordered from the U.S., from Australia. Because I needed something to avoid getting yellow hair, like yellowish, avoid brassiness. But still my hair is quite dry, so I needed something that didn't dry the hair.

And about that time, I also started like the Curly Girl Method. I mean no parabens, no silicones, no sulphates. And all the blue shampoos in the market, from the most expensive to the high street ones, they had sulphates, they had silicones, they had the harsh like chemicals. And I said, no, I'm not using this. I tried everything, like pigments, everything. I said, there's nothing here. I couldn't find. I didn't mind how much I paid. I couldn't find.

I come from marketing, I had 30 years in marketing, and I want to create things. And I say, I can create this. I didn't have any contacts. I didn't know anyone in the industry. I didn't know the industry at all.

But I started researching in 2017. By 2019 I found some developers. I started trying formulas. I briefed them what I wanted; natural pigments, something that I can use every day. I wash my hair every day, almost every day because I do yoga, swam by that time. And I wanted something that I could use on every wash, not one day, and then four washes with a normal shampoo. No swapping, simplicity.

Helen: Yeah.

Silvina: And natural, no parabens, no silicones, no sulphates. So, I did a very clear brief. But it was very hard to find a factory because the developers do like thousands, and thousands, and thousands of units.

And I started very, very small because I founded this. I didn't have any investments from anyone. It was all my funds, right? And I didn't know if I was going to sell tghe stock. I said, this could work. Or maybe I said to my friends, I will give you as a present for all the years to come my shampoo and my conditioner, because I didn't know, I had no idea.

I had worked in marketing, and in all of those things, but for massive companies, for FMCG, and massive, massive companies like Coca-Cola, Unilever. This is different being an entrepreneur, being a founder. And I started little by little doing everything myself. I did the website myself. Actually, I still do everything myself. 

Well, back to that time, I found a factory who did bigger quantities. But I told them my project, what the project was about, and why I wanted to have that brand. Because I want people to feel great with their hair. To have something simple. Not have to be dealing if their hair will be yellow, and if it's not yellow it will be blue. If it's blue it will be dry. 

So, I wanted to simplify to help people go grey, and go more natural, like also being conscious with the environment. We are not bringing chemicals from colouring. And really colouring is so stressing for women, that I think getting rid from the colouring from the routine of colouring every two, three, four weeks is such a relief, that I think I had a purpose, you know. To help people, to help women have something, some products they can trust. And it's simple. I use three products, nothing else.

Helen: And what are the three products?

Silvina: Shampoo, conditioner, a shampoo which is blue, and grey hair oil. The oil, I used to use oil for my curls, but all the oils are yellow. And this is not yellow, it's super, super transparent with a little, little, little shade of blue. A very light shade of blue. So, it's nice. It's nice, and it doesn't make your hair yellow. 

So yes, that factory say, yes, okay, we will go with your quantities, well the quantities you can afford. And I'm still producing with them. But it's an adventure, I've been in the market for three years. I launched in December 2022. And I'm learning. 

It's like having done a university, because it's e -commerce, it's another world, yeah. And everything changes so fast, and yes, but I love it. Every day I wake up with something to do, some ideas. My main struggle is I don't have time to do everything I have in mind, everything I would like. To contact all the people, I would like to contact, to chat about this, and to send them product to, if they like it, they can talk, but I don't have time. 

I take care of the customers as well. For example, if someone has a problem, I know they write to me. I respond to all the messages. I do the social media. I do the emailing. I do everything, but I like it. And I tried hiring freelancers to help me, but it's not my voice, you know, I want to.

Helen: Yeah. Yeah.

Silvina: And sometimes people who work in e -commerce are young, let's say the truth. People who work in social media, they don't understand how we talk, women in our 50s. We take a little more, things slower, I think.

Helen: I'm gonna ask you one last question. If somebody came to you and said, I'm thinking about going grey, what advice and tips would you have for them? 

Silvina: I would say, if you feel it, if you really want it, you will do it. Just do it. It doesn't matter, the transition. If you cut short, if you do highlight, just do it. I feel when you decide, when you have that in your mind you do it. Right? 

If you, if you’re not convinced, if it’s because of the trend, or because you want to get rid of the colouring is not the real goal, like embracing my grey hair, probably will be difficult the transition. Because you will have moments when you want to give up. I never, never, never, never during my transition, thought about giving up. 

And something funny, I used to dream that I coloured my hair. And when I woke up, I said, what a relief, I haven't, if not, I have to start again, I have to start again. But in my dreams, I said, okay, I coloured my hair, I will start again. I never said, okay, I will continue colouring. 

But it's great not to have to conceal, to hide something that is you, something that is a part of you. And something that is how we live because we cannot have the same body, the same hair, the same as we did as people of 20 years old. We have our body, at our age, everybody will go through that, so why neglecting that?

Helen: Yeah, that's completely my philosophy. I just think we're so hooked on the aesthetics of youth, that a lot of people are not then thinking about how am I gonna age healthily and happily.

Silvina: Yeah. We for many, many, many, many years Society like focused on young people, focused on youth, even for marketing for brands in youth. There aspirational thing was youth. 

Whereas many years before, many, many, many years, times of our grandfathers, old people were respected.  Young people wanted to grow up to be a respected person, but then everything changed. 

But I think now we are coming back to not us being invisible. To have our voice. To have our places. So, I think, yeah, if you want to go grey, do it, don't hide. But it's your decision. 

And if I can tell something is, I have spoken with thousands of women through my Instagram, and I haven't met any who regretted going grey. On the contrary, everyone is like, so happy. I always say it's a beautiful target to work with a brand, like I work with Silvina London. Because we love our grey hair. 

Helen: Yeah.

Silvina: We want to buy something nice, something to take care of the grey hair. And also, we used to spend a lot of money in colouring. A lot of money, and a lot of time. So, buying a shampoo, a conditioner, having a great haircut, we can do that.

Helen: Yeah. 

Silvina: And something that we want to take care of. We are proud of, we want to say, okay, I did it. I am here. Yeah, this is me.

Helen: Cool. Well, I'm gonna say thanks so much for joining me. 

Silvina: Thank you.

Helen: Enjoy the rest of your day.

Silvina: I thank you very much for having me, Helen.

Helen: Thanks so much for joining me for this week's show. I hope you've enjoyed it as much as I have. I'll be back again next week, but in the meantime, you can follow me on Instagram at happier.grey. Have a great week.